This is a God thing, not me...

This is really mixed up, so read from line 13 and then line 1 and then line 8 and then line 2 - note last thhree lines esp...

Facebook can be the greatest invention since tripod - it makes me depressed, no matter what i read.
Boo hoo - no, i'm not making a mistake. Facebook is the same even without silly applications.
Sure, I have met up on facebook with old school friends - you think its easier talking to people on a social network?
Facebook, facebook, facebook, etc. Not the same as meeting in person...

Back in the day, before I knew about how God can do anything, I was an emo geek. I spent hours in front of a pc connected to the internet. The days of dialup - from 7pm to 7am and weekends at R7 a net connection call. I abused the net. I would sit on IRC networks, program using a multitude of languages, goto church via the radio. It may seem the great good life, but if you could read between the lines then you would know the sorry ass I became. My friend or two, Christopher and Deon who both live(d) down the road from me, were the only people I knew as people. Guys at school were just humans walking around earth. Deon saw the gaps and tried to fill them by introducing me to his friends, getting drunk and going to clubs - thanks for trying, but that just screwed my life even more. Christopher - I think this guy is an angel, sent by God to ground me when ever I started flying... {incomplete thought}

I remember taking a few fasts of computers --- what a waste of time. sure, i would not use the net for a while, but when i got back, i went straight back to my old ways. For those that know of IRC.. NO, it is still a burden to me - something i cant let go of. something I really miss like Richard, Kevin, Craig and Mark - they kept me from going back to a really bad network. channel meets. sandton city. oh that old life looks so welcoming and juicy. being made negative on the net makes me wonder what my life would have been if I knew what i knew back in the day and told the people more about me. rejection and maybe a bit more.

This is all mixed up. I wish I could find my old life-blogs. I think i had 6 or 7 chapters. ahh, memories of old. thanks Justin, I enjoy life more because of what you taught me - wish we could be friends again...miss your unique friendship. Yeah, I changed it - I was in a negative mood and said some things I did not really mean.

It's not because of God - I went from aweful to good with God, without God i went from bad to worse. God makes me better.

i'm sick of negative thoughts exploding when I'm having fun and enjoying the web under my board as I surf around...

For me the internet is the biggest trap of them all. http, ftp, irc, etc. all make my life a depression state.

email and eastside website, only the essentials. I need some solitude from all this. If its like food and i really REALLY need it, then ... perhaps too..!

I need to get away from the paperless society. I cant go on being broken up like this...
say what you will about facebook and the internet, but its not for me.

this is not a fast. this is a far greater thing. this is a God thing